Post by barry on Oct 29, 2010 18:43:17 GMT -5
enjoy lol
5 years before season 1...
This morning was horrible, and good, so I guess over all it was okay, if that’s an inbetween.
It was horrible because it was Halloween, this is when mom says the weirdo’s roam, and it’s the only day of the year when she lets me out of the house. I guess on normal day’s I’m weird and on Halloween I’m normal, was it opposite day to? I’m defiantly going to have to fix my calendar.
I put my costume on, when James’s reflection appeared in my bed room mirror. The first thing that popped into my head was “STALKER!” The second “ YES!”.
“What are you wearing?” He asked quietly.
I smiled, “It's my full body cast, you like? I got it when I broke my body a few years ago."
" Your WHOLE body?"
" yup." My mom actually took one looked at me, and dropped me out of a three story window. Now I'm flattered, My beauty was probably to much for her.
“What are you supposed to be, some sort of weird, creepy, un dead mummy?”
“I was actually going as a person wrapped in white toilet paper but okay! What are you going as?”
James had glitter running down his shirt and his face, he was REALLY sparkly! He had an Edward Cullen mask over his face.
“I’m going as a vampire, can't you tell? Geez Louise Jessie! Get with the times! how much longer until the academy party?”
“About an hour.”
“Awesome!” I spun around in my body cast, “I’m going to be the most Gorgeous, beautiful, hottest, Sexiest, prettiest, charming, grand, handsome, ideal, lovely, magnificent, nice, pleasing, grand, nice, pulchritudinous, radiant, ravishing, refined, resplendent, shapely, splendid, statuesque, stunning, sublime, superb, symmetrical, pleasing girl there!”
“Gosh Jessie, you said grand twice! You must be really beautiful.” James took in a deep breath, “I’m so lucky to have a woman like you.”
“I know you are, but remember what we talked about James your only with me until I can find a real boy friend.” I ran my hands through my hair and fixed my cast to where her hair would point out of the top, “You know I have no social skills, But I’ll find one.”
When we got outside our limousine was waiting for us. James had a weird habit of calling it “lemon seen”. Like he had seen a lemon, when we searched through the rental catalog. He said the vehicle looked like a smashed lemon. We had practiced the night before on pronouncing various other words so we don’t look like twerps on our official first date. I aggressively shoved James inside, and we sat down.
Suddenly I heard “Prepare of trouble.", My Ring tone!
I flipped open my phone; it was my long kind-of-lost father! He went on tour around the street corner and never returned; mom said he could never make a career out of playing the triangle.
“Hey Jessie.” He said.
“ Dad, has it really been seven years!?”
“ Seven years? Jessie I saw you last night! How are you?”
I starred at James, “ Dad, I’m in the deepest Love in the history of the entire universe and before that!”
“ Gosh, when someone ask, ‘How are you?’ your supposed to say, ‘good, nothing really’ or somthing esle boring! who is he? I hope he doesn’t have a crappy voice actor and weird hair, that's the kind of boy you’d end up with.”
“ But dad!” I gasp, “ James does have a crappy voice actor AND he does have weird hair!”
“ Hold on Jessie can I call you back? I just wanted to let you know I’ll be home tonight. You better stay away from those boys with weird hair!”
Then he hung up. James was starring at me akwardly.
He shed a tear. “ Is my hair….really weird?”
I got on my knees, grabbed his hands and cried with him, “ Yes James! It really is!”
I could see the school up ahead, heavily decorated with pieces of plastic shaped like Halloween stuff.
When the limousine door opened, I stepped out and Camera’s flashed, we were in front of “The academy” a school for teenage Team Rocket members in training. Every eye, mouth and nose were starring at me. I remembered seeing some posters of Brittney spears, and just decided to do what she does in paparazzi moments. I spread my legs ( which proved difficult in my cast), and put my hand behind my head and danced. All I could do was a weird hoping motion, which caused me to fall over and bang my head against an unusually hard plate of grass, wait that’s a rock.
Behind me, James stepped out and his mouth dropped.
James picked me up and But when I looked back, I realized the Cameras were not taking pictures of me, But of Cassidy who was walking on the other side wearing a Butch costume…No wait that’s just Butch.
Why couldn’t I get anything right today?
I stormed my way over there to him “ What is the meaning of this twerp!”
“ Ha ha.” He laughed in a heavily, over gravely voice. “ Didn’t you hear? I’m the first trainer ever to catch a Giratina. Origin form to, how ya like that?”
More of the paparazzi took pictures of Butch. I threw my hands in his pocket and took out an Action replay and held it in front of the them, “ You see? He’s fake, now get home I’ve got a party to become queen of.”
I suspected as much! That’s what Butch goes and buys when you give him twenty dollars. It reminds me of that children’s book, “ If you give a mouse a cookie.”
I’m writing my own called , if you give a butch a twenty. While walking towards the door, James re joined me, “ Bye cootch!”
“ My name is Butch!”
It was hard to jump towards the building in my cast, but I still managed, When we got up to the door, James went before me and I tried. I bumped my head on top of the door frame and couldn’t fit inside. What kind of monstrosity was this? But before I could even figure out what that meant, James picked me up, held me horizontally and carried me inside.
We went into the gym where all the other kids were. It was largely decorated with Halloween pumpkins, ribbons and balloons. Cassidy was already by the punch bowl lashing out as people walked by knocking them down to the ground.
I grabbed James arm and strolled over to the othe rside to another set of punch bowls away from cassidy. There were four lined up next to each other. With labels that read, A, B, AB and O.
" Jame's get me some punch!" I commanded, raising my head. " It's what good slaves uggh...boy friends do."
" But Jessie!"
" Now!"
He grabbed a plastic cup, ran it through the red liquid then nervously handed it to me. I drank it and spat it back out in Jams's Face.
" What was that? Apple? Fruit punch? Apple fruit punch, Apple fruit blast of punch?" I ran different flavors through my head.
“Jessie that was real blood. You do know that right? I tried to warn you! You know how ruthless Team rocket is, there’s another, regular punch bowl on the other side of the room"
Jessie threw the cup down; all of the other kids began breaking out in zombie-like dance. Jessie ran forward onto the dance floor, “Hey does everyone know how to do the sponge?" It was a dance I had learned off sponge bob, “come on James lets do the sponge!"
“But Jessie." James said, " Everyone else is doing, the zombie."
“I don't care, let's be original."
James and I jumped up and slammed out chest against each other. We moved our bodies in weird motions and acted as if filter feeding before Giovanni; the boss grabbed me and held me firmly. Now I remember! James and I weren’t supposed to come to the dance in the first place. The day before I had walked into Biology like any normal girl and tripped over a pencil. I fell in slow motion and hit a desk, which hit another desk and then another. The final desk hit a book shelf which shattered the second story window on the other side of the class room and fell out. The book shelf hit Giovanni's brand new car completely ruining the wind shield and part of the hood. After yelling, death threats and much counseling, Giovanni had just decided to suspend me from the Halloween party. I didn’t care, I get my coordination from James it really wasn’t my fault.
A few minutes later he threw us back outside the school which was now deserted of life.
James and I wondered around town for a few hours until midnight. We hung out at mcdonalds, ice skated without the ice and tried to find some twerps but no luck. Then we found our way inside a grave yard. James began acting un easy, breathing heavily into a brown paper bag.
“ I can’t go in there!” He gasp for another breath, “ Dead things make me feel all woobly inside.”
Walking was impossible in my costume and I couldn’t jump for ever, so I got down on the ground and slithered like an ekans.
“ James stop being a twerp.” I replied, “ If we cant go to a party we’ll have our own right here.”
“ Goodness Gravy Jessie! Don’t zombies live in grave yards? I’m not sure how much more of this risk taking I can handle!” James took another breath inside the bag, “ I’ve seen a lot of zombie movies, Resident goodness, twenty eight days before, Night of the living humans, you know what happens, right?”
“ Yeah, and do you notice they almost always make it out alive?”
James bit his lip, “ I guess so.”
We walked past a few Graves, some large, some small, some tall, some long, some without thongs, I can’t think of any more rhymey words. James and I took rest behind one that seemed to have an open casket.
“ Isnt this so romantic? In a dirty old grave yard on Halloween night under the full moons surrounded by who knows what?”
“ I guess so.” James inhaled again, then breathed, “ I should call my mom, she might be worried that I haven’t changed my underwear in over an hour or that I that I'm hanging out with a girl”
" But James, you are!"
" SSSHHHHH!! she doesn’t know I like girls yet! going to call her." James took off his Edward Cullen mask and set it down next to him. He took out his phone, but I slapped it away throwing it across the yard.
“ Hey watch it!” A voice called out, a large shadow appeared before us.
James grabbed onto Jessie and squealed, “ I that..A ZOMBIE!?”
“ Remember the movies James.” I reminded him. James put his Edward Cullen Mask on. Probably hoping another, meaner vampire might scare it away.
Another Vampire appeared behind us, the one I must have thrown the phone at. It wore a red cape , glowing red eye, huge fangs, fancy outfit; it looked exactly like James’s Edward Cullen costume.
The boy jumped off the grave and landed by James, suddenly I couldn’t tell who was who.
Suddenly, one of them got up and ran screaming, “ Not zombie! Not zombie! Vampire!" His voice became extremely high pitched, “There’s a vampire over there, someone call the Navy!"
I suddenly knew the one still in front of me was James, he’d never leave me. He knows he’s like a toy to me.
“ So James…?”
“ what?” He replied, “ I’m not James.” He leaned forward, his fangs growing larger, closing in on my neck, “ Time to for a sip.”
I backed him up, “ James I know I only let you kiss me in private but please….not around all these dead people, that’s so sweet though! I’ll have to write that down in my journal of things we almost did!”
“ I’m not James. I’m Real vampire, my names Lance.”
James was faking it and I was going to prove it. I reached forward for his pale skin to pull off the Edward Mask, but he cried out and seemed to get angry. Man, he had it on there tight. He calmed himself, and starred at me for a moment.
“ Before I turn you into A Vampire, allow a poem.” He took a small harp and strum it, “ Roses are red, Violets are blue, I smelled something funny, then I noticed its you.”
“ Oh James, your so Romantic!”
“ Why thank you But I’m not…never mind, come here!” He leaned forward again, bringing my neck closer. James suddenly just got so much hotter!
" I've returned for you Jessie!" A voice called out, " I'll save you from the one who does not sparkle!"
It was the other vampire who had re appeared the one who ran off screaming, he leaped forward and pushed the hot James back against the grave. Suddenly other vampire's face fell off revealing a human James."
“ Wait! If your James…who just tried to bite me? I looked at the other Vampire, I can’t date both of you! Well…actually..”
The real vampire spat out before she could finish, “ I don’t want you, just your blood.”
“Isn’t that prostitution?”
“ No that’s giving me what I want before I starve!”
James tried to use what he learned in women’s karate against the real vampire, “ Baby kick, baby punch baby kick, baby punch!” He yelled into the night swinging his arms and legs widely, “ 10 more reps!, baby kick, baby punch, baby kick, baby punch!”
A few minutes later, The real vampire laid there on the ground unconscious. I raged.
“James you twerp!” I raged, “ You just beat up my real first boy friend! He was so poetic."
Now I had a real man to take home to my dad. I felt bad for James, but he'd always be my intimidation toy, and that has a special place in my heart.
5 years before season 1...
This morning was horrible, and good, so I guess over all it was okay, if that’s an inbetween.
It was horrible because it was Halloween, this is when mom says the weirdo’s roam, and it’s the only day of the year when she lets me out of the house. I guess on normal day’s I’m weird and on Halloween I’m normal, was it opposite day to? I’m defiantly going to have to fix my calendar.
I put my costume on, when James’s reflection appeared in my bed room mirror. The first thing that popped into my head was “STALKER!” The second “ YES!”.
“What are you wearing?” He asked quietly.
I smiled, “It's my full body cast, you like? I got it when I broke my body a few years ago."
" Your WHOLE body?"
" yup." My mom actually took one looked at me, and dropped me out of a three story window. Now I'm flattered, My beauty was probably to much for her.
“What are you supposed to be, some sort of weird, creepy, un dead mummy?”
“I was actually going as a person wrapped in white toilet paper but okay! What are you going as?”
James had glitter running down his shirt and his face, he was REALLY sparkly! He had an Edward Cullen mask over his face.
“I’m going as a vampire, can't you tell? Geez Louise Jessie! Get with the times! how much longer until the academy party?”
“About an hour.”
“Awesome!” I spun around in my body cast, “I’m going to be the most Gorgeous, beautiful, hottest, Sexiest, prettiest, charming, grand, handsome, ideal, lovely, magnificent, nice, pleasing, grand, nice, pulchritudinous, radiant, ravishing, refined, resplendent, shapely, splendid, statuesque, stunning, sublime, superb, symmetrical, pleasing girl there!”
“Gosh Jessie, you said grand twice! You must be really beautiful.” James took in a deep breath, “I’m so lucky to have a woman like you.”
“I know you are, but remember what we talked about James your only with me until I can find a real boy friend.” I ran my hands through my hair and fixed my cast to where her hair would point out of the top, “You know I have no social skills, But I’ll find one.”
When we got outside our limousine was waiting for us. James had a weird habit of calling it “lemon seen”. Like he had seen a lemon, when we searched through the rental catalog. He said the vehicle looked like a smashed lemon. We had practiced the night before on pronouncing various other words so we don’t look like twerps on our official first date. I aggressively shoved James inside, and we sat down.
Suddenly I heard “Prepare of trouble.", My Ring tone!
I flipped open my phone; it was my long kind-of-lost father! He went on tour around the street corner and never returned; mom said he could never make a career out of playing the triangle.
“Hey Jessie.” He said.
“ Dad, has it really been seven years!?”
“ Seven years? Jessie I saw you last night! How are you?”
I starred at James, “ Dad, I’m in the deepest Love in the history of the entire universe and before that!”
“ Gosh, when someone ask, ‘How are you?’ your supposed to say, ‘good, nothing really’ or somthing esle boring! who is he? I hope he doesn’t have a crappy voice actor and weird hair, that's the kind of boy you’d end up with.”
“ But dad!” I gasp, “ James does have a crappy voice actor AND he does have weird hair!”
“ Hold on Jessie can I call you back? I just wanted to let you know I’ll be home tonight. You better stay away from those boys with weird hair!”
Then he hung up. James was starring at me akwardly.
He shed a tear. “ Is my hair….really weird?”
I got on my knees, grabbed his hands and cried with him, “ Yes James! It really is!”
I could see the school up ahead, heavily decorated with pieces of plastic shaped like Halloween stuff.
When the limousine door opened, I stepped out and Camera’s flashed, we were in front of “The academy” a school for teenage Team Rocket members in training. Every eye, mouth and nose were starring at me. I remembered seeing some posters of Brittney spears, and just decided to do what she does in paparazzi moments. I spread my legs ( which proved difficult in my cast), and put my hand behind my head and danced. All I could do was a weird hoping motion, which caused me to fall over and bang my head against an unusually hard plate of grass, wait that’s a rock.
Behind me, James stepped out and his mouth dropped.
James picked me up and But when I looked back, I realized the Cameras were not taking pictures of me, But of Cassidy who was walking on the other side wearing a Butch costume…No wait that’s just Butch.
Why couldn’t I get anything right today?
I stormed my way over there to him “ What is the meaning of this twerp!”
“ Ha ha.” He laughed in a heavily, over gravely voice. “ Didn’t you hear? I’m the first trainer ever to catch a Giratina. Origin form to, how ya like that?”
More of the paparazzi took pictures of Butch. I threw my hands in his pocket and took out an Action replay and held it in front of the them, “ You see? He’s fake, now get home I’ve got a party to become queen of.”
I suspected as much! That’s what Butch goes and buys when you give him twenty dollars. It reminds me of that children’s book, “ If you give a mouse a cookie.”
I’m writing my own called , if you give a butch a twenty. While walking towards the door, James re joined me, “ Bye cootch!”
“ My name is Butch!”
It was hard to jump towards the building in my cast, but I still managed, When we got up to the door, James went before me and I tried. I bumped my head on top of the door frame and couldn’t fit inside. What kind of monstrosity was this? But before I could even figure out what that meant, James picked me up, held me horizontally and carried me inside.
We went into the gym where all the other kids were. It was largely decorated with Halloween pumpkins, ribbons and balloons. Cassidy was already by the punch bowl lashing out as people walked by knocking them down to the ground.
I grabbed James arm and strolled over to the othe rside to another set of punch bowls away from cassidy. There were four lined up next to each other. With labels that read, A, B, AB and O.
" Jame's get me some punch!" I commanded, raising my head. " It's what good slaves uggh...boy friends do."
" But Jessie!"
" Now!"
He grabbed a plastic cup, ran it through the red liquid then nervously handed it to me. I drank it and spat it back out in Jams's Face.
" What was that? Apple? Fruit punch? Apple fruit punch, Apple fruit blast of punch?" I ran different flavors through my head.
“Jessie that was real blood. You do know that right? I tried to warn you! You know how ruthless Team rocket is, there’s another, regular punch bowl on the other side of the room"
Jessie threw the cup down; all of the other kids began breaking out in zombie-like dance. Jessie ran forward onto the dance floor, “Hey does everyone know how to do the sponge?" It was a dance I had learned off sponge bob, “come on James lets do the sponge!"
“But Jessie." James said, " Everyone else is doing, the zombie."
“I don't care, let's be original."
James and I jumped up and slammed out chest against each other. We moved our bodies in weird motions and acted as if filter feeding before Giovanni; the boss grabbed me and held me firmly. Now I remember! James and I weren’t supposed to come to the dance in the first place. The day before I had walked into Biology like any normal girl and tripped over a pencil. I fell in slow motion and hit a desk, which hit another desk and then another. The final desk hit a book shelf which shattered the second story window on the other side of the class room and fell out. The book shelf hit Giovanni's brand new car completely ruining the wind shield and part of the hood. After yelling, death threats and much counseling, Giovanni had just decided to suspend me from the Halloween party. I didn’t care, I get my coordination from James it really wasn’t my fault.
A few minutes later he threw us back outside the school which was now deserted of life.
James and I wondered around town for a few hours until midnight. We hung out at mcdonalds, ice skated without the ice and tried to find some twerps but no luck. Then we found our way inside a grave yard. James began acting un easy, breathing heavily into a brown paper bag.
“ I can’t go in there!” He gasp for another breath, “ Dead things make me feel all woobly inside.”
Walking was impossible in my costume and I couldn’t jump for ever, so I got down on the ground and slithered like an ekans.
“ James stop being a twerp.” I replied, “ If we cant go to a party we’ll have our own right here.”
“ Goodness Gravy Jessie! Don’t zombies live in grave yards? I’m not sure how much more of this risk taking I can handle!” James took another breath inside the bag, “ I’ve seen a lot of zombie movies, Resident goodness, twenty eight days before, Night of the living humans, you know what happens, right?”
“ Yeah, and do you notice they almost always make it out alive?”
James bit his lip, “ I guess so.”
We walked past a few Graves, some large, some small, some tall, some long, some without thongs, I can’t think of any more rhymey words. James and I took rest behind one that seemed to have an open casket.
“ Isnt this so romantic? In a dirty old grave yard on Halloween night under the full moons surrounded by who knows what?”
“ I guess so.” James inhaled again, then breathed, “ I should call my mom, she might be worried that I haven’t changed my underwear in over an hour or that I that I'm hanging out with a girl”
" But James, you are!"
" SSSHHHHH!! she doesn’t know I like girls yet! going to call her." James took off his Edward Cullen mask and set it down next to him. He took out his phone, but I slapped it away throwing it across the yard.
“ Hey watch it!” A voice called out, a large shadow appeared before us.
James grabbed onto Jessie and squealed, “ I that..A ZOMBIE!?”
“ Remember the movies James.” I reminded him. James put his Edward Cullen Mask on. Probably hoping another, meaner vampire might scare it away.
Another Vampire appeared behind us, the one I must have thrown the phone at. It wore a red cape , glowing red eye, huge fangs, fancy outfit; it looked exactly like James’s Edward Cullen costume.
The boy jumped off the grave and landed by James, suddenly I couldn’t tell who was who.
Suddenly, one of them got up and ran screaming, “ Not zombie! Not zombie! Vampire!" His voice became extremely high pitched, “There’s a vampire over there, someone call the Navy!"
I suddenly knew the one still in front of me was James, he’d never leave me. He knows he’s like a toy to me.
“ So James…?”
“ what?” He replied, “ I’m not James.” He leaned forward, his fangs growing larger, closing in on my neck, “ Time to for a sip.”
I backed him up, “ James I know I only let you kiss me in private but please….not around all these dead people, that’s so sweet though! I’ll have to write that down in my journal of things we almost did!”
“ I’m not James. I’m Real vampire, my names Lance.”
James was faking it and I was going to prove it. I reached forward for his pale skin to pull off the Edward Mask, but he cried out and seemed to get angry. Man, he had it on there tight. He calmed himself, and starred at me for a moment.
“ Before I turn you into A Vampire, allow a poem.” He took a small harp and strum it, “ Roses are red, Violets are blue, I smelled something funny, then I noticed its you.”
“ Oh James, your so Romantic!”
“ Why thank you But I’m not…never mind, come here!” He leaned forward again, bringing my neck closer. James suddenly just got so much hotter!
" I've returned for you Jessie!" A voice called out, " I'll save you from the one who does not sparkle!"
It was the other vampire who had re appeared the one who ran off screaming, he leaped forward and pushed the hot James back against the grave. Suddenly other vampire's face fell off revealing a human James."
“ Wait! If your James…who just tried to bite me? I looked at the other Vampire, I can’t date both of you! Well…actually..”
The real vampire spat out before she could finish, “ I don’t want you, just your blood.”
“Isn’t that prostitution?”
“ No that’s giving me what I want before I starve!”
James tried to use what he learned in women’s karate against the real vampire, “ Baby kick, baby punch baby kick, baby punch!” He yelled into the night swinging his arms and legs widely, “ 10 more reps!, baby kick, baby punch, baby kick, baby punch!”
A few minutes later, The real vampire laid there on the ground unconscious. I raged.
“James you twerp!” I raged, “ You just beat up my real first boy friend! He was so poetic."
Now I had a real man to take home to my dad. I felt bad for James, but he'd always be my intimidation toy, and that has a special place in my heart.